Winter is here in Durango, and it’s still a few days away from the winter solstice. The days are short (in terms of daylight hours) and it has cooled considerably. We’re currently on the tail end of a cold front that brought night time lows to -3 and only limited highs to about 27. This is as cold as weather as I’ve ever experienced my entire life. However, I have acquired some warmer clothing since my stay here and it’s not all that bad. We’ve had some decent snow here in town, and in fact, I’ve been commuting to work on my new snow bike in up to 4″ of it, but it’s not quite cold enough for a lot of to stick around, except for north slopes and shaded areas. The ski resort a half hour up the road, well, that is a different story. Last I heard they were reporting a 40″ base.
I was able to snag a volunteer position at the ski resort for the winter. In exchange for 14 days of my time, I get a season lift ticket (about a $800 value). More importantly, I got arguably one of the coolest volunteer positions available, a snowshoe tour guide. Last weekend we had a voluntary snowshoeing orientation up on top of the mountain. A few feet of fresh powder had fallen the previous days and we were out to break some new trail for the season. I have never snowshoed before, but there’s really not much to it. If you are treading fresh deep powder on hilly terrain, it’s actually quite a workout and a lot of fun. Up on top of the mountain and out of bounds, you are traversing undeveloped land. There are no groomed slopes, not structures of any kind, no logging, no signs of human intervention whatsoever, unless you aren’t the lead dog.
The snow glistens, the wind stirs tiny crystals from the fir and spruce trees. You happen upon rabbit and fox tracks. The trail winds through trees and into meadows that in the summer time flourish with wildflowers but are now blanketed in a sea of deep powder. There are no machines, no artificial sounds, no obligations, no time constraints : just you, the forest, and the snow. It is quite a beautiful thing.
I try and paint this idyllic portrait for you so you can understand where life is taking me these days. Moving to Durango has been an extraordinarily profound life changing event. This blog was primarily established to track my racing results and progress, but racing is no longer a priority for me. I do not possess the talent, time, and resources to be at the level I truly would like to be at. This is besides the point though.
The main point to take from this post is Durango has changed me, and probably not in the way that you would expect-certainly not in the way I expected. I thought moving to a place with some of the best mountain biking in the world would make me a better rider and sharpen my competitive desire. While it has definitely made me a better rider, it has somehow quieted my desire to race.
It’s funny how life was in Texas. For some odd reason, serious cyclists feel this urge to race all the time. It’s not uncommmon to see people race all year long in road, mountain, and cyclocross, maybe even triathlon. No one tells them they have to be at every single race TMBRA or TXBRA puts on each year. They certainly don’t get paid to do so (except for a very small handful) In fact, racing is a super expensive hobby. Yet, there is still this internal voice in their heads saying that they just have to race. I know, because I was one of those people. The emphasis that racers put on results, benchmarks, goals, whatever, it just isn’t healthy. Here in Colorado, lots of people still race, but they aren’t as crazy about results as are all my buddies back home. It’s more about the ride, the people, the experience, the natural beauty.
A mid pack Cat 2 racer here is just as strong as a top Cat 1 in Texas. A fast Cat 1 here could easily hold his own against a Pro in Texas. Sure, living here can make you a better rider, but it doesn’t necessarily make you a better racer, mainly because you would rather just enjoy the ride rather than bury yourself at 90% max heart rate and be on the throttle with your head down the entire time. Racing takes away the fun factor, and fun is the number one reason people move to Durango. Epic rides through the mountains. Ripping downhill sections. Cresting 13,000′ mountains on foot. Shredding powder in the winter .Floating the river in the summer. It truly is all about the journey, NOT the destination. Racing puts too much emphasis on the destination, not the journey. 12 and 24 hour races are a little different, but they’re still races.
For this reason, I’m stepping down from racing for an indefinite period of time. No more “training”, just playing. No more strict dieting, no more bike or gear upgrades, just playing in the mountains, on my terms, on my time. Truth be told, I’ve even been slacking on my Caveman roots. I more or less stick to a Caveman diet, but more and more things like flour tortillas (for breakfast burritos), hamburgers and fries, chicken tenders, and a few other forbidden items (like beer and my housemates homemade banana nut bread) have crept back into my diet. Life is just too damn short to not enjoy things that are just really enjoyable.
I only work out when I’m motivated. Biking, hiking, skiing, snow shoeing, and living at 6500′ generally are plenty to keep my fitness at a good level. Paying work is still a bit of a problem, but I do have enough to get by. Getting by is the name of the game in this town anyways. Even though there are hundreds of houses over $350,000, I never seem to meet the owners of such properties, usually just the people that rent them out, and like me and most every other bike or ski bum who lives here, they’re just getting by. We wouldn’t want it any other way though.
Since I won’t be racing for a while, I’m not sure how often I’ll blog, but this blog isn’t just about racing, its about adventure, so I’m sure I’ll do something once a month still. I’d love to share with you all of my adventures, but words just wouldn’t do them justice, and besides, the mountains are calling…
Mmmmm…Fresh powder…
Thanks to all who have supported me in my journeys thus far. Please realize I’m not quitting, just shifting gears. The best is still yet to come. Keep an eye out around New Years for my final 2011 post. Happy Holidays to you and yours.
Caveman
Happy to hear that you’re playing more often these days!
Hi Greg,
I’ve watched you race a few times. You don’t know me. I watched you patiently waiting to accept your 1st place before. I’ve watched closely. You are one of the few people I think embodies the spirit of a champion. You are competitive yet humble. You are daring yet calm. I also think, and this is not a put down, young. Take what I say with a grain of salt, because I do not know you well but I’v experienced similar changes of heart in my life and I’m twice the age you are. I’ve competed in several events in my life, some I’ve done very well in. I too took “breaks”. However, at the time, I saw them as a full-blown change of heart. They weren’t and I was too young to understand. Life isn’t about all or nothing. You can do 50 races a year and smell roses or you can do 2 and smell roses. While many or most may not, you can. I know other riders who exemplify this way of thinking. Don’t feel you have to quit racing or take much of a break. I applaud you for being introspective enough to know what you find happiness doing but I would hate to see you give up something that later you will regret. You have more talent than you know. My friends train bloody hard all year only to lose to you. If you knew how hard they train only to come in 2nd, 3rd or not at all you might understand you have gifts. Not to say you don’t train, don’t work your ass off, you undoubtedly do. However, imagine doing what you do only to come in 3rd every time. While it’s motivating to keep trying, it’s also demotivating to think you aren’t gifted enough. YOU are gifted enough. Take a break. clear your head and then think about racing SOME to keep your competitive edge. When you are 50, you will be thankful you did. Rationalizing is the worst human trait. It allows us to do anything and rationalize that it’s ok. When we get older, you see through that smoke. Good luck to you!
Spectator,
Thank you for you valuable insight. The thoughts in one’s heart aren’t always expressed properly on paper. I’m not quitting permamently. So much of who I am is ingrained in racing bikes that I know it is something I cannot escape forever. In this phase of my life I just have too many other things that need attention. I would dare to say this break will last between 1-3 years. Do not get me wrong, I feel that I have a lot of talent, but after moving to Colorado it is very apparrent that I don’t have the talent needed to compete at a national or international level. I might turn a few heads in Texas, but here, I’m just a so-so midpack rider. Perhaps time will prove this statement wrong, but until it does, I know where my place is. Do not think that I’m taking an all or nothing approach either. I’m still playing hard and loving the heck out of it, I just don’t feel like I need to race to prove it. Hope to meet you at a race someday. Cheers!